Redefine: To be content

The other day I witnessed something that instantly got my attention. Two parakeets arguing.

As they sat there, perched on the branch of the little tree next to our porch, their loud screams penetrated the usual consistent tranquil sound of the the wildlife surrounding us. Their beaks wide open, their stance stern, they were ready to attack and knock the opponent off of the tree. Vicious. I sat there observing and I could not figure out what in the world these two parakeets could be arguing about. Space? Doesn’t make sense. Plenty of branches to go around and there are only two of them. Food? Can’t be. Plenty of fruit just sitting there waiting to be devoured. Mates? Doubt it. They are pets, and the only two parakeets of their kind around here. It just didn’t make sense.

What intrigued me even more, was why this event grabbed my attention to the extent that it did. Argument is such a natural thing. Even considered by some these days to be an art and a hobby. It has been around as long as living things have been around competing for resources and mates. So why did an argument make me stop mid step, put all my activities on hold, and just watch? Well, because in 2 and a half weeks I have not witnessed a single argument or disagreement. I live in a house with 10 other people. However that is truly an understatement. I think about 10 people have beds here. However, considering all of the family and neighbors that visit on a regular basis this place redefines a “full house”. And yet, no arguments. Voices are raised only to call someone over or in a moment of excitement. I have considered that maybe people just argue in private. But who am I kidding. Privacy does not exist here. Though I will save defining that concept for another day.  Different form of arguing? Maybe in this culture people have a more subtle form of disagreeing with each other. Could be. But I spend so much time with this family in such a small space and honestly have never witnessed any tension. People are always conversing, smiling, laughing. To be honest, I have never smiled and laughed more in such a small amount of time as I have here. My cheek muscles are probably going to be stronger than ever. And wrinkles, I am now understanding may not solely serve as an indication of age or the amount of sun that one has been exposed to. Wrinkles may just as well be an indication of the amount of happiness that one has been exposed to. In which case, when I return to the United States, I will be wearing all my happiness wrinkles proud.  

At some point, I needed to simply let go of the fact that I was simply not noticing the arguments here because there exists some secret form of arguing. The reality is, that opposed to the world in which I grew up, opposed to what I have always been taught indirectly by example, opposed to everything that I have come to believe over the past 23 years of my life, there exist places where waking up on the wrong side of the bed doesn’t signify that every person encountered is just another annoyance you must pretend to be excited to see and waste the little energy you have to force a smile onto your face.  There exist families who have one television for 12 people instead of 2 televisions per individual, and they still manage to always agree on what to watch and enjoy as a family.  There exist individuals, who do not revert to arguing every time something needs to be done, or simply because they are bored. To think that I have witnessed arguments because someone was given a moca frapaccino made with fat free milk instead of soy milk.

I am still uncertain what it is about this place. Is it all the nature that makes this people so content. Is it the culture? Though it cannot be a Panamanian thing because I have definitely seen a clear difference between the city and bigger town folk, opposed to the campo people. Maybe it is their lifestyle and the priorities that they have. My family lives in a quaint little place. They have the things they need. Beds, a kitchen with running water and a stove, a latrine, a porch on which they can all share their evenings together, and a television that they can also enjoy in their free time. It is not that I am deciding for them that they do not need anything more. But from my observations they seem very content with what they have. They work as artisans and make all sorts of crafts. However, they never make it appear as work or a chore. It always seems to be just a hobby of theirs, a way for them to pass their time, and often even a way for them to pass time together, chatting as they weave and carve. I have heard them speak about money but never with a note of concern or urgency in their voices. It is truly all intriguing, and I hope to gain a better understanding of it as I continue to get to know them.

A Motivated Community

(More pictures will be added in the future)

Just a few months back, before I had any idea what community I would serve in, and right after I visited a volunteer at her community, one of my biggest fears was that I would be working in a community where the people were either unmotivated or just truly did not want to work with a Peace Corps Volunteer, and therefore it would be a huge struggle for me to get anything done, since really as a volunteer all my work depends on the people, their needs, and their willingness to work with me.

Now when I look back at this time I can’t help but laugh because I honestly couldn’t have been more off. The majority of community members are extremely motivated and until now I have only heard wonderful things about all the Peace Corps Volunteers that have served here, and how much people enjoyed working with them. People here are really excited to get started on things. For example today I ran into one of my distant neighbors. He informed that a bunch of people on the other side of town have been asking about me and when they can start working with me. Since they do live in another sector I have not yet had the opportunity to meet them, but I hope to meet them soon.

However, in a community like mine, a volunteer does walk a fine line. As new volunteers the first 3 months in our community are really supposed to be designated towards community analysis - getting to know the people and the needs.  However when the community is this ambitious, and this anxious to get started you have to really learn how to explain this to people well. Overall people have been very understanding of the process, but some things can not be avoided or pushed back any further.

For example since the current volunteer is leaving in the beginning of June, the transition of her recycling program at the school to me has begun. Beginning June I will be in charge of it. Luckily we have held our Recycling Committee meeting and all the parents that serve as part of the committee have up until now been reliable and very helpful so I hope our work together goes well.

In addition to this there is a group in my community that really wants to get ecotourism started here. They really want my help, but I am almost uncertain with what because they are extremely organized. They have been coworking with a number of governmental agencies. They are currently in the process of becoming a legal entity as a group, and also in the process of developing a hiking route with a number of other communities. I have been attending all their meetings and am very impressed by them. For now I have been helping in the small ways that I can. The other day, my neighbor and I painted most of this Artisan workshop that will be used as one of the stops on the tour guide of our town. I have been talking with my host sister who is the secretary of the organization and am slowly learning about more ways in which I will be able to assist them in the future. Although indirectly, I believe that the recycling program at the school which will hopefully soon be expanded to include the whole town, will certainly aid the cause as will.

ANAM is the national environmental agency and serves as one of our counterparts here in Panama. Before I started I heard many mixed opinions on what it is like to work with the agency. Once again, I have been very fortunate. Their is a group in my community that works directly with ANAM. I have worked with them a few times thus far. One of the days we gave a tour of the artisan sector of our community to a tourism students from a high schools. This allowed me to learn a lot about how things are currently done and what can be improved. 

Another day I helped them mix up dirt with organic fertilizer, and then pack over 300 small bags with the dirt, and then plant a tree seed in each one. This group has a vivero or..... it is working on reforestation. I hope to work with them on this. With all of the community members depending on the rivers for the water, and the animals depending on trees for food, it is extremely important that they reforest the watershed, and hopefully with native trees.

In addition to all of these projects already in the making, my community proves its motivation in yet another way. Community working days. These are days on which community members get together to work on an immediate issue. For example this past week they were pouring concrete on part of the road. The road to the sector that I am currently living in is a gravel road. One that is very unstable in the dry season as the stones just roll and the tires of the cars, nor my shoes really can get any traction on all the hills. During the rainy season I incredibly grateful for the gravel and wish there was more as the roads quickly turn into a muddy slippery mess.

About 20 of the men got together on the Sunday to work. My sister and I got together with two other women to cook lunch for the men. We cooked all this wonderful food for them. Unfortunately the man did arrive a few hours later then expected so a lot of the food was already cold. However most of them gobbled it up anyways. The only downside was that they did not arrive sober. Serving food to 20 hungry drunk man.... can be an interesting experience to say the least. All went relatively well though. They all appreciated the meal, and we appreciated the work that they did for the community. And considering that there are no cantinas (bars) in my community, and it is illegal apparently to sell any alcohol in my community ( which I am extremely grateful for) I guess it is no surprise that when 20 men get together they will want to have some seco once in awhile.

Let's Get Crafty!

While living with my family I have made the effort to pick up some of the crafty skills of my family while living here. This to some degree may be a bit selfish of me, but I cannot deny that I want to obtain these skills and use them for years to come. Who wouldn’t want to be able to make beautiful earrings for all their friends and learn to paint all these wonderful birds and frogs that will probably one day take over the walls of my home?

I have already made my first pair of earrings out of seeds. The pretty seed at the bottom is from a tree called Corotu. It is my favorite seed and I arrived in Membrillo right in time to collect a bunch before the rainy season arrived. Although my first pair of earrings is complete, I have a lot to learn. They know so many cool tricks, where as I just get frustrated that I can’t get any thread through the seed.

First pair of parrot earrings also complete. These were even more of a learning process.

Fir

st I carved out my two tiny parrots out of wood. I learned, that tiny does not mean less work. On the contrary, it is more work and significantly more tedious because it becomes quite difficult to carve out all the little details. I am quite proud of myself because I didn’t have anyone demonstrate to me how to carve out the little guys, instead I just picked up a little one that was already carved out and decided to give it a shot. Luckily the wood did not go to waste.

Then I had to use sandpaper to get rid of all the little ridges. 

After this I had to put a layer of some sort of substance on them that Jadira says allows the paint that will be later applied to dry a lot quicker. It was after this substance was applied that they appeared best to me. I really like the look of the natural wood, even though they were two different colors.

However I decided to do things they way they are done here and complete the earrings. The next step was softly sand papering the earrings after the substance was applied. At this point I was so ready to paint! But I learned that I must apply the same substance on again. This time it took longer to dry. I then had to sand paper the excess of. Of course at this point I was dying of anticipation to grab the paint brush and go at it. But as you may have guessed, one more layer and a final time of sanding it down. My little parrots looked sad at this point, a little beaten up, but I had to have faith in the process. After inserting a little metal piece on top where they were ready to be painted. At this point Jadira and I sat down and I basically attempted to imitate her every stroke with the paint brush. It is at this point that I deeply regretted becoming a perfectionist somewhere along the past 23 years. With hands as shaky as mine I knew my parrot would be far from “perfect” and so the two parrots look very different from one another. But then again isn’t that truly perfectionism as defined by nature. No two things in nature look exactly alike, always differentiated by their little flaws, more accurately described as little sparkles of individualism.

Any guesses on which one I painted? :)

Screaming Parrot and Walk-In Closet

I have now been living in my community for nearly 2 weeks. I still have not come to terms with the idea that in just a few weeks I will have to leave my family and home in this part of town and move to a new home. Please do not understand me wrong. I have met my second family and they are wonderful as well. However, I have already grown attached to the very diverse personalities of my family members here, to the lifestyle here, to the mornings surrounded by all shades of green, a refreshing breeze and the sound of birds. I guess I just have to keep an open mind and really focus on the long term advantages of living with multiple families. Although I will once again have to adjust to the daily routines of a new family, and somehow, not certain how, move all of my things there, I am certain that in the end it will be worth it. It is extremely important that I have a chance to get to know each part of town well, especially considering how different each sector is. I need to be able to truly know the people and form connections. The kind of connections that I feel are no longer formed within neighbors in the US. At least not in my part of Chicago. I not only need to get to know the community, but I genuinely have to become part of the community, and as you can imagine that can be difficult to do if you do not live in that part of the community. However, I have another few weeks until I have to move out of this little paradise of mine. So lets not think about that. Instead let me tell you all about my experience here!

My first few days here began with many spontaneous little hikes and nature photo shoots. What can I say, my family knows me well. Everytime I get excited about some leaf, flower, or mushroom, they basically say “Time for a hike!!!”  And my response is always, “Yes please!”

Our pet birds were the first victims to the persistent lens of mine. To be fair though, with such colorful and well pruned feathers, what do they really expect? Two green parakeets live on one of the trees right next to our porch. It is wonderful to see that they are not caged. Unfortunately, this is due to the fact that they are injured and cannot fly. At least that is what I was told about them. It is possible that the wings of the other were clipped. However, they still have the freedom to explore a bit and often they do. I am always intrigued by how quickly they can climb the trees using their

two claws and beak. 

These two fellos are my favorite to watch. Often they argue, not quite sure what about. Finally one moves over to the next tree and they sit there on separate trees just shouting at each other. Their interaction in many ways reflects that of humans. Well, of the humans that I have known for the past 23 years of my life. It actually is quite intriguing. For the week and a half that I have been here now, I have not heard a single argument. Not between any members of my huge host family. Not between any neighbors. Not between the staff at the school. Nothing. Not a quarrel, not even an intense disagreement. It is fascinating. I am left with no choice but to think that people here are just genuinely happy. I have not witnessed a single selfish action, nor have a been around anyone that appeared to be stressed out, frustrated, nor grumpy. Is this place even real? Are these people real? Can this really be paradise?

There is also our pet parrot, Bebo, who likes to talk. Actually, talk, does not do it justice. This parrot screams! Very conveniently, it feels the need to express its voice most at about 5am. I am slowly getting accustomed to laying in my bed at 5am listening to random high pitched phrases flying through the air, right through my window, and crashing into my eardrums.

Other times however, I have the opportunity to take photos of beautiful living creatures that do not interrupt my sleep on a regular basis. For example, the other day right after I woke up, my parents spotted some monkeys off in the distance so that instantly turned into a monkey and bird watching experience, and of course a nature photo shoot. Unfortunately the monkeys were a bit too far and much too fast for my camera. However, some of the birds were not. The woodpecker has babies in a tree right outside of our dining room window. The other birds with the yellow tails which I have not identified just yet, soar through the sky on a regular basis.

While still on the topic of my first few days I must mention my “walk in closet”. When I moved into my room I discovered that there really was no place where I could put my clothing. My simple but cozy room consisted of a bed, a small table, two windows, and a small random frog drawn on one of the walls.  Since I really did not want to live out of my suitcases for a month and arrive to the school with wrinkled clothing everyday, I decided to make myself a hanger out of a rope. However, I did not have a rope of my own so I asked my host dad if he had any that I could use. My rope hanger quickly turned into a whole project. The result was this. The coolest walk in closet constructed in 20 minutes.

While living here I have been trying to find a balance between spending enough time with my host family and on getting to get to know my community. I really enjoy my family and also feel like I owe them quite a bit for taking me in for a month. For this reason every day I help cook which is wonderful because I get to learn many new things. For example how to peel yuca. Yuca is a root that in taste is very similar to a potato but a bit more fibery. Although it grows like a potato, and looks relatively similar, it apparently is not peeled in the same way. I have also been washing the dishes after dinner as often as I can for the dozen people that eat dinner here. Jadira, my host sister and I have quite a system going, and as odd as it may seem I have always been a fan of washing dishes, so it doesn’t feel like a chore at all.

Dinner is often followed by a ritual that Jadira, my neighbor Ckaly, and I have developed. Tea time. Almost every evening he comes by with the ingredients, such as ginger roots or cinnamon bark sticks and we make tea with milk. Apparently lactose intolerance doesn’t exist in Panama. At least not for me :) I still haven’t figured out how my stomach mysteriously became more tolerant of all sorts of things, maybe they are less processed here. On nights when we decide to spoil ourselves we have some bread with our tea. We just sip on our hot tea as the cool night breeze slowly crawls. Evenings here at my site are cooler than I expected. I have been wearing the same fleece hoody every night... will definitely have to invest in some sweaters soon. We chat, and tell stories, and laugh a whole lot. These two love to joke around. Unfortunately it is still difficult for me to follow humor in Spanish, but nevertheless I always have a good time with them.

After tea time, follows telenovela time. A group of us watches “La Patrona” every night. It’s a Colombian soap opera, that although I hate to confess this, has become my guilty pleasure. It is with this twisted and unlikely storyline that I end most of my evenings and I head to bed thinking how wonderfully drama free my life here is.

Ofi! *

I lifted my right hand and repeated word for word after the Ambassador. As a group we sounded like a chorus, maybe even slightly like a cult swearing to dedicate and commit the next two years of our life to protect the USA. Our promise was written out for us.  No room was left for us to individualize our vows to the Peace Corps. However, as I repeated those words, my eyes slowly turned glossy. I knew that our service would be a very unique experience and an adventure that will not be repeated by any volunteer. Yet simultaneously an experience shared with many community members and many volunteers to come.

The last few words were repeated and next thing I knew we were all hugging. It was a moment that we had all waited for very long - nearly 2 years for many of us, considering when we first applied. At times it felt like it would never get here, simultaneously it felt almost like a surprise. The two months of training that had originally appeared excessive, flew by as strangers soon became friends and this foreign place began to feel like home. Now, with each hug I tried to express all my gratitude. With each hug I was reminded that in just a few days, this new support system that I had formed here, these individuals with whom I can share all my silly and petty stories about Panamanian life and how nothing ever goes according to plan, would be all over the country and no longer a 5 minute walk away from me.

It was finally time for us to take the reins into our hands. Every single day would no longer be planned out for me. Seems unreal after 2 months of following a tight schedule like a child in grammar school again. In just a few days I would hop on a bus and arrive to my town with my hiking backpack on my back and my unnecessarily heavy bag in my hand. I would hike up the hill to my host family house. I would place my stuff down, take a deep breath, wipe away the sweat off of my forehead, pray to the god of the Panamanian breeze that I never in my life have to sweat this much again, and I would begin my two year adventure. And that is exactly how my adventure had begun.

As soon as I was able to catch my breath, I took a look around, and I felt at home again. I had forgotten how beautiful this place was. Spectacular really. For the past week I had been afraid that while boasting to all my friends about this little paradise of mine, I may have made it out to be more magnificent that it really was and thus convinced myself of the same. However, now that I was here again, I realized that that I was preoccupied unnecessarily. This place was still very much so my little paradise. My dad, an extremely kind and genuine man, was here to greet me. As was my youngest host brother, 21 years old and the biggest goofball I have met to this day. Soon after, Yadira, my host sister and “community guide” arrived home. I was surprised at how comfortable I felt around these people after only meeting them for a few days two weeks ago. The rest of the afternoon was very relaxing. I helped Yadira make a salad for dinner as people slowly trickled back into the house. I then pulled out my DSLR to take some photos of the parakeets around my house. That quickly turned into a spontaneous hike during which my host sister and brother pointed out all the wonderful things found in nature that I should take photos of. For those that know me well, know that it was a perfectly spent afternoon for me. To finish the day off we watched Titanic, which happened to be playing on TV that night. Well.... I made an effort to watch Titanic with them. About an hour into the movie, my eyes decided that it was time for some rest. After an attempted battle, I finally gave up and got a good nights sleep instead.

*Ofi - Panamanian slang for "Official"

Below you can find a photo dump.

The back yard of my host families house.  This is the home I left behind. It was one of my last evenings there.   It just rained and everything appeared to be such a gorgeous shade of green.

Our host families in our part of town threw us a surprise goodbye party! It was extremely cute and impressive considering that in general they were pretty poor at planning. It was definitely a success. The sign however was my favorite part. Please note that the two "John"s are actually supposed to be "Joan"s. My name is spelled incorrectly too. But that is a very common mistake here in Panama. It's the effort that counts, right?

Below are photos from Swear In Day and our free weekend. They are a bit out of order. I apologize.

The Panama Peace Corps Director.  I have only had a few chances to speak with him this far but I can say that he is truly a wonderful individual and a perfect fit for his position. Unfortunately he will be leaving his position in just a few months.

Director of the Community Environmental Conservation Sector. There are no words that can express how amazing this man is. He is like that uncle figure that always wants the best for you. The person you never want to disappoint because you know how much he believes in you. He is also like a wizard and matched us all perfectly to our sites. I do not know how he does it.

Dinner at TGI Friday's after our ceremony

A day to relax after training. One last time for us all to be together.

You tell me what this is. I call it Peace Corps fun.

There just happened to be fireworks right next to us the night we were at the beach. I think they were just congratulating us :)

Speech by Francisco

Speech by Aja from the Teaching English sector.

Speech by Max from the Community Envirionmental Sector. 

Both were heartfelt and inspirational in their own way.

These guys really rocked it! and in Spanish!